What? Con’t

And the fun continues……

A commercial for mattresses: The announcer says ‘lumpy mattress’

I hear: ‘monkey mattress!'

 

Hahahahahahaha

 

Monkey mattresses!

Is that mattresses in the shape of monkeys? Or monkeys jumping on mattresses…..?

 Commercial says: ‘other pans sell for…..’

 I hear: 'underpants sell for……..'

 Bwhahahahahahahaha!

Arby's commercial says: 'It's good mood food'

I hear: 'It's good nude food!'

?                                        

Okay, all together now

............. "What?"

The Estrogen Has Left the Building

(Is it hot in here, or is it just me?)

I love a good turn of a phrase!

 Here’s one I found in the book I am currently reading, “Die for You” by Lisa Unger.

It describes me perfectly!

“She had lost her estrogenic glow!”

Hahahahahaha!

Perfect!

Random Rants

When did the word ‘function’ become obsolete?

Did I miss the memo?

 When did it become passé?

It is now functionality????!!!

Seriously?

Function, yes; functional, yes; functioned, functioning, functions, functionless, functionally, yes, yes, yes, yes, and yes.

 But functionality?

Really?

Who are we trying to impress?

(For some reason this particular linguistic pretension DRIVES ME NUTS! LOL)

Evolution of a Cat

Fluffy

aka:

Fluffernutter

Floogie

Fluffenator

Flugmeister

Fluff

Kitty

Damn cat

No wonder she’s confused! 

Relationship Advice 101

My mother was very wise.

She gave me some sage advice about love.

Here’s what she told me:

You have to love a person for who they are, not who you think you can make them into.

Having said that she added this analogy.

It’s like getting a dog. You love the dog. It’s sweet and cuddly and kind and gentle. But it’s a dog. You can’t make it into a person. Whatever you try and do it’s still going to be a dog.

BUT, you can train it. Hopefully, over time it will become a dog who doesn’t chew your slippers or mess on the carpet.

But the bottom line is, it’s never going to be anything other than a dog and you simply have to love it for its dogness.

Don’t you just love analogies? 

Whole Lotta Bakin' Going On

Husband is the baker in the family.

I guess that’s been established already. Lol

He made his famous cornbread last night. 

I’m in heaven!

He said I could share the recipe with you. 

2 tbs butter

¾ cup flour

1 cup sugar

1 tbs baking powder

1 tsp salt

1 ¼ cup yellow cornmeal

1 cup milk

2 eggs

2 tbs butter, melted

Preheat oven to 425°. 

Warm a 9 inch cast-iron skillet over moderate heat.

Add 2 tablespoons of butter to skillet and heat.

Meanwhile, in a bowl, sift the flour with the sugar, baking powder and salt.

Stir in the cornmeal. 

Add the milk and eggs and stir lightly. 

Add the melted butter and stir just until blended. 

Scrape the batter into the hot skillet, the butter in the skillet should bubble. 

Transfer the skillet to the oven and bake the cornbread for about 18-20 minutes, or until the center springs back when gently pressed. 

Turn the cornbread out onto a rack to cool.

Best served with a tall glass of cold milk! YUM!

Enjoy! 

Remember Etch-A-Sketch?

I had an etch-a-sketch. My brother broke it.

We were at Gettysburg (my father, being a history major in college, dragged us to every historical site on the eastern seaboard for our vacations!)

I was minding my own business (and not taunting my brother for a change) and he dropped a lead bullet on the screen .

My parents had bought him a box of lead bullets at the gift shop as an educational toy! (Oh, the good old days! LOL)

I was upset, at first. But then it was kind of cool because we got to look inside and see how it worked.

To shut me up and stop the fight that ensued my parents promised to buy me another one.

Funny, I don’t remember getting a new one!

Another ‘Plein Air’

Before you go getting all “Way to go!” I did this sitting in a completely empty parking lot, in my car! Not quite as brave as it sounds! LOL

There are tons of these free real estate magazine ‘dispensers’ all over the city. 

All lined up like little advertising soldiers.

Elements, con't

This whole 'Elements' theme seems to have stuck in my head as 'lines'. 

I'm seeing the element of line everywhere I look!

Keep Out!

Right here, right now

All I ever wanted from this whole ‘drawing’ thing was to be able to sketch something recognizable.

To put pen to paper and have someone say, “Yes, that’s a flower" (or whatever.)

I don’t care if the proportion isn’t right. It doesn’t matter if the shape is slightly wonky or if the highlighting isn’t quite spot on.

I’m not looking to be the next BIG ARTIST. 

This whole journey has been for me. And although I know I have much further to go, I’m happy where I am, right now, right here.

(I hope I can remember this the next time Miss Muse takes a vacation and the inner critic is having a field day! LOL)