.....and other random stuff......

Thursday, November 23, 2017

Thoughts on a Thursday

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? 

Tuesday, November 21, 2017

I’ve Decided My Lousy Housekeeping Is a Public Service

Here’s my thinking……if I keep a perfect (ahem) house, dust free and orderly, then anyone who comes over is going to feel bad that THEIR house can’t live up to my high standards! They will fall into a deep depression because of my pristine housekeeping. Therefore, if I DON’T dust and I DON’T put things in their proper places….THEN whenever anyone visits they are going to feel SO superior by comparison they’ll be floating on cloud nine for DAYS….. maybe even WEEKS!
You’re welcome!  

Monday, November 20, 2017

Punny Monday

   I discovered I scream the same way whether I’m about to be devoured by a great white shark or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot.
(footnote:I'm running out of good puns so I've decided to switch to PARAPROSDOKIANS.
PARAPROSDOKIANS (Winston Churchill loved them) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.)

Friday, November 17, 2017

Taa Daa It's Finally Done

....well, except for the area rug......which, for the life of me, I can't decide on....
This is looking from the foyer into the laundry room.


This is looking from the garage into the laundry room (it was easier to take the 'panorama' shot from this angle.)


And THIS is the reason for the whole re-do. I wanted a broom closet to keep the vacuum cleaner in. It's a 30" cabinet....add that to the width of the machines and you don't have enough room for the sink cabinet.....BUT....with the weird little 'wedge' of empty space behind the machines and Husband's amazing abilities he made it work! He placed the machines at an angle that allowed him to fit the sink base between them and the broom closet (with a bit of customizing.)  
There is more storage space than I have 'stuff'! But storage is always at a premium so thinking ahead about re-sale value we thought it was a good idea to use all the space we had and put cabinets up to the ceiling. I need the step stool to reach them but storage is storage and I've only put things that we hardly ever need or look for up there.  
And this is the little step stool I bought at Ikea (in the children's section) so I can actually see the settings on the dryer! 
Once I can make up my mind about a rug it will be officially DONE! 
But for now I just wander in there to admire it's gloriousness.....and occasionally do a load of laundry! 

Thursday, November 16, 2017

Thoughts on a Thursday

Somewhere between the comfort of a routine and the misery of a rut lies contentment.

Tuesday, November 14, 2017

It’s No Longer the World I’m Used To

Don’t worry, I’m not going to get all preachy or political (not that I couldn’t but we’ll leave that for cooler heads.) No, the story I’m going to relate is sort of the way I feel the world is spinning out of control…….and it’s sad.

As I was running errands the other day I noticed a young mother and her two little girls. We were at the library and we checked out at the same time but at different kiosks. As I walked to my car they were behind me, the little girls were telling their mom about their school day. 

I got into my car, they got into theirs. I drove off to my next errand. 

As I was walking into the supermarket noticed I was behind the same mom and little girls. I didn’t say anything……..at first….but when we all turned down the same aisle I laughed and said to them, “We have to stop meeting like this!” And I continued saying, “I was just at the library and noticed you and now here we are again!” because apparently she didn’t understand why I was making the joke…….

The look on the mom’s face was complete horror as she grabbed the girl’s hands tighter and literally dragged them down the aisle as one of them tried to reach for something on the shelf. The girls were trying to turn around and look at me as their mother kept yanking their arms to get them away from me! 


I don’t THINK I look like anyone to be afraid of.......but I guess in this day and age everyone, even gray haired old ladies, aren’t to be trusted…..and isn’t that the saddest thing you’ve ever heard.

Monday, November 13, 2017

Punny Monday

  The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
(footnote:I'm running out of good puns so I've decided to switch to PARAPROSDOKIANS.
PARAPROSDOKIANS (Winston Churchill loved them) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.)

Friday, November 10, 2017

Progress.....

....sort of.....




Someone said they look a bit scary.....I prefer to think of them as 'quirky'.....lol 

Thursday, November 9, 2017

Thoughts on a Thursday

The downside of renovation: You can’t remember where you put anything once a room is finished and rearranged. You CAN remember where it was twenty years and three houses ago---but not where the item is right NOW----when you need it! (That is if you didn't throw said item away in a fit of purging! LOL)

Tuesday, November 7, 2017

Yikes! It's Official!

No matter how hard I tried.......I couldn't stop the inevitable! 

Monday, November 6, 2017

Punny Monday

(footnote:I'm running out of good puns so I've decided to switch to PARAPROSDOKIANS.
PARAPROSDOKIANS (Winston Churchill loved them) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.)

Friday, November 3, 2017

And Now For Something Entirely Different......

Sometimes I get bored working 2-dimensionally.......I get an urge to play with something tangible in my hands. 

A while ago (and I'm embarrassed to say it was really years ago) I was playing with papier machè and I made a bunch of  'heads/bodies' by covering water balloons with strips of newspaper dipped in glue. 
But then I lost interest.....SQUIRREL.....and moved on to other things. 

The other day that tangible urge struck again and I remembered the box of 'eggs' under the work bench. I dragged them out, dusted them off and now find myself adding paper clay and making.....I don't know what.......

This is what I've done so far. I'm curious to see what they become....because I have no idea whatsoever.....lol.



 
 


Thursday, November 2, 2017

Thoughts on a Thursday

The road to divorce ….is paved with GPS devices. When there is a GPS AND a wife in the car there is one too many navigators…..

Tuesday, October 31, 2017

I Can’t Wait to Show You….

Even though it’s not finished.

So it started off here….sort of. I forgot to take a before picture, I almost always forget to take a before picture….but you get the idea.


And then came the new machines. The unbelievably, amazingly, ridiculously priced machines! 


And then the new layout and cabinets. We’re still waiting for the delivery of the sink and faucet, and Husband needs to make the counter and back splash but I couldn’t wait to show you! 


And the funny thing is, even with more in the room it seems BIGGER! I’m loving how it’s turning out! Pretty soon Husband will ‘hand me the keys’ as he puts it and I’ll be able to add those nice little touches… like art on the walls, and a beautiful new rug. I also get to put everything back in the cabinets!  

I won't go into details, because that would be totally boring, but....Husband had to 'finesse' the cabinets to fit into the space we have (the sink cabinet was 1 1/2" too big to fit in between the machines and the other cabinet.) And that piece above the machines he had to design and make from scratch because the room is a weird shape and that part is at an angle....I warned you the details were boring.....What I'm saying is he is awesome and incredibly talented and he can do MATHS! 

(PS If the picture looks a little 'wonky' in places it's because I used the panorama mode to get it all into one shot.) 

Monday, October 30, 2017

Punny Monday

One thing that humbles me deeply is to see that human genius has its limits while human stupidity does not.
(footnote:I'm running out of good puns so I've decided to switch to PARAPROSDOKIANS.
PARAPROSDOKIANS (Winston Churchill loved them) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.)

Friday, October 27, 2017

Two More of the Collaboration

Here are two more from the collaboration with my friend Carol. I struggled with the first one….not sure why. I just wasn’t pleased with the way she was turning out. I finally admitted defeat….or is it acceptance? Either way I call her done. 

After


This was just mindless fooling around on my tablet. I like it.
Before

After







Thursday, October 26, 2017

Tuesday, October 24, 2017

Too Many Changes for This Old Fart

Things are changing way too fast around here. Well, it’s not so much things are changing, although they are and change is, you know, HARD! It’s that the changes bring with them a host of new technology.

We got a new Cable system that brought with it a new menu to learn……with MORE menus within the menus! I was never very good at outlines in school, the Roman numerals, headings, sub-headings, lettering….blah, blah, blah…. all these menus bring back some very unpleasant memories.  

Not to mention a new remote!

Now we have a new washer and dryer I swear was designed by NASA engineers! Just LOOKING at it intimidates me! I want to wash my clothes not orbit the earth!

There are soooo many menus! If the pre-programmed choices don’t suit your needs….the menus have drill down menus….. and don’t even ask about the app for your phone that offers even MORE choices! (I’m not kidding…an APP!)

I used to have HOT/WARM/COLD to choose from on the old washer. Now I can actually choose the EXACT water temperature! Like I know what temperature is best for my clothes! I know water boils at 212°…….that is the extent of my water temperature knowledge.

Now it wants me to choose the type of cycle I want, the water temperature, the SPIN speed!!!! Do I want steam???? Wrinkle reducing?????……in the washing machine? WHAAAAAT????

I just want to do a load of laundry for God’s sake! I mean, I don’t even separate the clothes anymore. With just the two of us in the house there’s very little laundry to do so I just lump everything together in one big load!

I guess for people with a lot of laundry to do, big families, families with kids, who participate in sports…..these new machines are great. But for we empty nesters I don’t really need all the bells and whistles. So I’m suggesting to all the washer/dryer manufacturers of the world, it might be a selling point to add an ‘old fart’ cycle to your machines……for all us oldsters out here who just want to clean our clothes.

Just sayin’. 

PS A little added bonus for you....the 'Dryer Song'! (I had 'issues' uploading this video and I clipped it one note too short, lol. Just pretend the whole thing is there....I don't have the patience to re-record and fight to upload it again....)


Monday, October 23, 2017

Punny Monday

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
(footnote:I'm running out of good puns so I've decided to switch to PARAPROSDOKIANS.
PARAPROSDOKIANS (Winston Churchill loved them) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.)

Friday, October 20, 2017

Defining Respect .......

.......when you replace the toilet paper roll in your son's bathroom with the end coming over the top, because that's the way he prefers it....even though it goes against every fiber of your being......

Thursday, October 19, 2017

Tuesday, October 17, 2017

Collaboration

A few weeks ago, in a burst of artistic fervor, I suggested to my online friend Carol we should exchange background pages to see what the other would do with them.
I ♥♥♥LOVE♥♥♥ her background pages….and as you know from this blog I am ‘background impaired’!

So…..we created and mailed our respective pages. She even sent me a finished piece on one of my backgrounds! I just adore her ‘girls’! They have such soul. 
Isn’t she sweet?

As an added bonus she made a tiny sketchbook from one of my backgrounds adding Khadi paper inside for me to play with. It even has a dangly bead! 

I took her papers and propped them up on my easel so I could ‘ruminate’ on them before taking pen to paper. As they sat on the easel I became more and more apprehensive about ruining them.
Sooooo…..I scanned them into the computer, opened one on Tabley and played in Sketchbook Pro. That way I could try out different ideas without messing up the original! Plus I can use them over and over!

This is the first one. Isn't it YUMMY? 
From this.....
To THIS!
Here is my first attempt. I like how working on a piece started by someone else pushed me out of my usual style. 
(She reminds me of an old friend, I call her 'Ginny'.)

Monday, October 16, 2017

Punny Monday

There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.
(footnote:I'm running out of good puns so I've decided to switch to PARAPROSDOKIANS.
PARAPROSDOKIANS (Winston Churchill loved them) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.)

Friday, October 13, 2017

When You Think Your Husband is Losing His Mind

But it turns out it’s YOU!

Over the past several weeks we’ve noticed the dishwasher has been leaving little puddles on the floor for us to discover in the mornings. It’s old, well past its prime and predicted life span so, we have no complaints. But we still use it, while waiting for a replacement part.

Apparently it’s demanding more of our attention. Instead of just a small puddle in front of the machine it has decided to branch out into the living room. Thankfully into the unfinished part of the living room, the part where the old tiles have already been taken up but not re-tiled yet with the new ones so it’s bare concrete with splotches of white paint. I tell you this part so you’ll have more sympathy for me and see this tale from my point of view…..

Last night as we lay in bed listening to the offending machine, Husband mentioned he put down a piece of paper towel to see if it really IS the dishwasher causing the lake to form in the living room every night. Which, of course, made me get up to look because I can’t NOT look when someone says something like that.

So, there I am, standing in semi-darkness, looking for a paper towel to see if it’s wet. 

I see a trickle of  water spreading out across the room…..I see the concrete darkening from being wet.....but I DON’T see a paper towel. I turn on a light……wet, yes….paper towel no…….

I go back to the bedroom and ask, “You put down a paper towel?” “Yes,” says Husband.

I go back to the living room….and I look again. Nothing. No paper towel….just water.

I worry about Husband sometimes…..he seems to be getting just a little forgetful lately…so of course I go back into the bedroom to chide him about THINKING about putting down a paper towel but forgetting to do it.

He gets up, walks into the living room, turns on another light and points triumphantly at the soggy paper towel. 
Of course when I take a picture the flash illuminates the paper towel beautifully for all to see!

In my defense he had folded the paper towel in half….I was looking for a WHOLE paper towel….AND it was so totally drenched it was practically transparent! It blended in perfectly with the splotches of white paint on the concrete!
Of course none of that mattered because now I was the one staring senility in the face!

File this under any number of headings: #fadingeyesight…........#karmasabitch…..…#boomerangeffect…......#nevertrytomakefunofyourHusband….. take your pick! 

Thursday, October 12, 2017

Thoughts on a Thursday

And on the seventh day she rusted……this growing old stuff ain’t for sissies…….

Tuesday, October 10, 2017

Olly Olly Oxen Free!

When you’re wondering why your husband isn't answering you…….


Monday, October 9, 2017

Punny Monday

 When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.

(footnote:I'm running out of good puns so I've decided to switch to PARAPROSDOKIANS.
PARAPROSDOKIANS (Winston Churchill loved them) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.)

Friday, October 6, 2017

So, as I Was Saying......Bits & Pieces.....

 I draw random 'bits & pieces' while watching TV with Husband. 
Sometimes they make a more interesting 'whole' when combined than drawing the creature/person organically all at once. 

This
plus this
and this
and this

 scanned and combined in Photoshop make this

Then I printed him out and added clothes and color and texture.
I added facial features from my old PDF sheets cleaned him up a bit, re-scanned him and voilĂ !

I prefer collage the old school way, cutting and pasting IRL but I'm trying to improve my Photoshop skills. 
Like how to add a drop shadow. 
I need more practice but I'm pretty 'chuffed' with how he turned out.