Another Late Night Encounter with Nature…. the Battle Continues

It’s late at night.

I’m sitting at my desk working diligently (aka cruising Facebook…) and out of the corner of my eye I spy a movement on the desk.

I watch in horror as he walks along the edge of the desk.

S-L-O-W-L-Y….

Only inches away from me.

As if he doesn’t have a care in the world.

No, he didn’t just walk, he sauntered!

He swaggered! As if to say, “Ha! I terrify you! And I’m too big to kill! So there!”

My first reaction is a combination of fear and disgust.

I’m so close to him I can see the hair on his legs!

YUCK!

I think of waking Husband but that seems too sissy.

I consider letting him continue on his way, but then I’d know he was OUT THERE…..SOMEWHERE and that idea is just too disturbing.

So I gather up my courage, reach for a napkin and lunge!

GOT HIM!

I run to the bathroom and shake him out of the napkin into the toilet…..because I have this compulsive need to see that he’s actually THERE. I need to watch him circle the porcelain sea and disappear into the abyss.

I flush three times….just to be sure he doesn’t don his SCUBA gear and work his way back up the pipes.

As I settle back down in my chair triumphant in the knowledge that, once again, the balance of nature is intact....................

I observe a trail of little spots across the desk….…..he was so big he left footprints in the desk blotter!