Someone recently mentioned that her son has ventured into the
public temper tantrum stage of childhood.
This got me to thinking about how we used to deal with this
situation.
We are proponents of the ‘Empty Threat Theory’.
It goes like this:
When said child starts to act up in public, first you must
decide if it’s a meltdown or a tantrum.
These are two very different things. A meltdown comes from
overstimulation, lack of sleep, or hunger.
(Or any combination of the above.)
None of which are deliberate on the child’s part or under
their control.
In this case I would just abandon whatever it was I was
doing, scoop said child up and remove them from the situation.
BUT…… on the other hand, if it was a deliberate and
intentional temper tantrum this is how it went down:
I would grab their upper arm and squeeze tightly, lean down and
VERY quietly whisper in their ear a threat so heinous and ludicrous that they
knew I would never do it (i.e. “I’m going to break off your arm and use it to
beat you until you are a bloodied pile of congealed intestines if you don’t
stop RIGHT NOW!”)
I kept a smile plastered on my lips but had daggers in my eyes, until their eyes would go wide
and they shut up.
This was very effective on the boys.
From that point on all we needed to do was to grab their
upper arm, squeeze and give them what became known as ‘the mother look’ and
they knew they had crossed the line and were entering dangerous territory.
Now, I know threatening children is not the perfect way to
handle a given situation, but if you’re a parent you know that there are times
when it is the most expedient, if not appropriate way of dealing with the
little crumb crushers.
Not that I’m suggesting you should try it of course!
Just sayin’.
Boy I wish we had thought of that!
ReplyDeleteWhen my kids were little we pretty much stayed home or had short excursions so meltdowns didn't really occur. We only had one or two temper tantrums too with the last one I remember was when my daughter was a teenager. I don't remember what it was about but she gave me the evil eye and I slapped it off her face - right outside a Sears store. I don't know who was more shocked, her or myself. I never even had to spank the kids once they understood language and we could talk to them. I guess I had easy kids as the biggest reason for even a spanking was because a three year old insisted she could cross the street by herself. Hopefully I won't be getting a visit from social services after this confession. We are talking about 35 years ago!
ReplyDeleteFortunately, my kids were pretty well behaved in public. I remember as a child, however, my mother would use that same tactic if we were not quiet enough in church. All she had to do was stretch her arm past the "silent child" to get to the arm of the "noisy child," and pinch. Not just a quick pinch, a pinch that lingered.... The pain of the pinch of course drew you to the look in her eyes which clearly said,"If you keep this up, I will have to kill you before lunch."
ReplyDeleteLOL. Hahahahahah! Whoah mommy!
ReplyDeleteHa ha! It works too...I'm a mother to 3 boys, two of which are at the meltdown age 2 and 3. Funny post!
ReplyDeleteHahaha oh yeah that would work. Have a cold look for these situation too. It consist of smiling lips plus unsmiling eyes, teeth not coming very far apart while speaking. Also, address boy in question no longer with 'you' nor self with 'I' but with his first name and 'mama', respectively.
ReplyDelete