Wordless Wednesday

The One That Got Away

Finally……..because I've been working on him for what seems like FOR-EV-ER.....

INTRODUCING…….Herb! Telling you about ‘the one that got away’.

He swears it was THIS BIG!

(That shot ^ was for you annie! lol)

Seriously! THIS BIG! 

Punny Monday

A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don’t need it.

(footnote:I'm running out of good puns so I've decided to switch to PARAPROSDOKIANS.

PARAPROSDOKIANS (Winston Churchill loved them) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.)

Pretty In Pink

Husband gave me flowers for my birthday! LOL 

It's actually a 'weed' from the front lawn but I couldn't be more pleased if it were a dozen long stem roses! 

As a matter of fact I prefer the weed to roses!  (These didn't make me sneeze!) 

Thoughts on a Thursday

If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how will anyone ever know? 

Wordless Wednesday

Electronic Twilight Zone…. Re Faire

OR……I have inherited my mother’s ‘talent’ with electronics.

Never has it been more evident than last night when I went to make my Fauxppuccino.

A little background here…..I have been making myself what I loving dubbed a Fauxppuccino for years. It’s a blended concoction of flavored K-cups, crushed ice and skim milk. I make it in the single serving container of my Ninja blender. So, last night, there I was with all the ingredients in the container….I plop it on the base……AND……..nothing!

Nada!

Zilch!

The power button doesn’t even light up. Uh-oh……

Okay, so I make sure it’s plugged in (don’t laugh; you know you’ve done that too!)

Check.

The ground fault plug hasn’t popped.

Check.

The container has engaged with the base.

Check.

Hmmmmm. I don’t see a problem but like any good technician shooting a trouble I retrace my steps from the beginning.

Check, check and check.

I can’t figure out the problem and am beginning to get frustrated which, in turn, brings Husband into the kitchen to see what’s going on. As he walks by he pushes the power button and the F#@*ING thing turns on instantly!!! He chuckles and keeps on walking.

I push the ‘single serving’ button that is supposed to engage the blades and……..NOTHING!!!!

Not a whirr, not a hum, not a sound of any kind!

I push it again….. nothing!

At this point I'm really starting to get pissed ……..Husband walks by again, leisurely pushes the single serve button, and the Ninja starts like it's going to blast off the counter!!!!

WTF? 

I don't know what's going on here but I have christened Husband the Appliance Whisperer. 

Punny Monday

The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!

(footnote:I'm running out of good puns so I've decided to switch to PARAPROSDOKIANS.

PARAPROSDOKIANS (Winston Churchill loved them) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.)

♪♫♪♫♪ Baby It’s Cold Outside ♪♫♪♫

Woke up this morning and my phone said it was 27°!!! 

No way! It can’t be! This is SOUTH FLORIDA! 

So I turned on the news…..no, it’s not 27°…..it’s 31°!!!!

…the hell…..????

So here I sit all bundled up, heavy sweatshirt over my outfit, swaddled in a fleece throw and SOCKS!

I haven’t had socks on my feet in at least fifteen years!!!! It feels so……weird……

What? 

You knew I was going to sketch feet didn't you????? 

Thoughts on a Thursday

Why are plastic bears the only animal you can get honey from? Why can't you get honey from a plastic bee? 

Wordless Wednesday

Because I Can

These were exercises in mark making I was working on for a class. 

And because I'm still trying to perfect my screen captures on TableyToo

 and because I can...... I made this for your amusement! 

(Okay, it was really for my own amusement but why keep it to myself when I can make you suffer too!) 

LOL

Make sure your sound is turned on, it's

 the best part! ;)

 (It's also better at full screen.....just sayin', lol)

Punny Monday

  “There’s a bunch of different crunches that affect the abs … my favorite is Nestle.” — Shmuel Breban

(footnote:I'm running out of good puns so I've decided to switch to PARAPROSDOKIANS.

PARAPROSDOKIANS (Winston Churchill loved them) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.)

My Twisted Mind

I think there might be something seriously wrong with me…...(no comments from the peanut gallery, please!) 

Here’s one reason why.

As I sit at my desk in the studio I can see out the front window. I can see my neighbor’s house across the street. I watch their comings and goings…..nothing very interesting. Going to work (I assume) grocery shopping, walking the dog. Just run of the mill stuff.

Until last week when I saw the male neighbor, let’s call him Doug, put out a mattress and box spring for the garbage men to pick up (upside down I might add!!) I also noticed I hadn’t seen his wife, let’s call her Sandra, in the last few weeks. Her car was there but I hadn’t seen her tending to her plants on the front porch like usual, or coming and going from work. Hmmmm……

My imagination started to bubble. Had Doug killed her and was throwing out the bloodied mattress to get rid of the evidence. Seems unlikely he would put it out for the garbage men but sometimes hiding in plain sight is the best way to hide!

Then came the U-Haul truck! Aha! What a brilliant way to get rid of the body!!!!! Nobody would think to question that! It sat in the driveway for two days. Plenty of time to clean up the scene of the crime!

My imagination was swirling……then their daughter came home.

Apparently she finished grad school and was moving out….. she hadn’t really been living at home since she went off to college. Just comes and goes occasionally for holidays.

I have to admit I was kinda’ disappointed. Well, not really. I’m glad Doug hasn’t killed his wife….but it WAS an interesting few days there…..

Thoughts on a Thursday

If quitters never win, why do they tell us to quit while we're ahead? 

Wordless Wednesday

Samantha

Santa (aka Son1 & Son2) was very good to us this year! They got Husband a new Garmin GPS device.

I think I’ve told you several stories about ‘Daniel’ his old Garmin.

We still used Daniel whenever we traveled, but…..and this was a HUGE but…..Husband never updated it. Because it was just too expensive. It cost less in the long run to buy a new device than to update the old one. The trouble was….and I say this with love in my heart…..he never bought a new one because “Daniel is just fine, he gets us there….eventually.”

Except we go up to Tampa/St. Pete quite a bit and they are doing massive road expansions. It’s been going on for years! And Daniel had no idea! He had us turning into a retaining wall at one point for God’s sake!!! Even then Husband argued with my Google map and preferred to side with Daniel!!!!

AARRRGGGHHHH!!

So an elf told Santa Husband needed a new one and we got…….SAMANTHA!

She is WONDERFUL!

She tells us where to go in a gentle and soothing voice, she lets us know IN ADVANCE which lane to be in for the next step in the journey, she gives a gentle little ‘ping’ when someone (I’m not naming names) goes over the speed limit, and best of all she doesn’t shout ‘RECALCULATING’  when we decide to make a pit stop (or make a wrong turn.)

 I think it might even be said she’s a marriage counselor…..she certainly has made one marriage much more pleasant….at least on road trips!  

Punny Monday

The difference between fiction and reality is that fiction has to make sense.

(footnote:I'm running out of good puns so I've decided to switch to PARAPROSDOKIANS.

PARAPROSDOKIANS (Winston Churchill loved them) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.)

Random Musings

You know how you start to get moody and cranky when you are too busy to sketch? How you feel grumpy and out of sorts?

That’s how I feel right now but not because I haven’t been sketching…..as a matter of fact I’ve been on my new Tablet (TableyToo) for literally HOURS trying to figure out the new and improved Sketchbook Pro app……which is really cool and I love it to bits…..BUT……..SHEESH…….did they have to change the gallery??????

I mean, it worked perfectly well the way it was. And I don’t see anything here that is an improvement….just different. 

And different enough to boggle the mind of this grumpy old lady!!!!!

After spending LITERALLY hours sketching I went to save my masterpiece and I LOST IT!!!!

I LOST THE WHOLE DAMN SKETCH! 

And it was pretty freaking good too! I can say that because eventually, after Husband talked me down off the ledge, I found it….buried somewhere deep in the nether regions of my files.

I’m going to have to do some research and see if I can’t simplify the settings to put them into a nice cozy (EASY TO FIND/ACCESS) gallery.

So, in closing, I want to say to the people who have made this awesome app even better…..in most instances……..as far as the gallery goes….if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!!!!!

Thank you and good night. 

I feel better now. 

NO NO NO!!!!!

It's going the wrong way!!!!!

Wordless Wednesday

Submitted For Your Approval……

Sorry, I spent the weekend watching the Twilight Zone marathon…...............................

and playing with my new toy, TableyToo.

The boys wanted to get me something special for Christmas. At first, Son1 tried talking me into a Wacom tablet but I said absolutely NOT! $2400 is WAAAAY too much money for a toy. 

We spent days messaging back and forth and debating the pros and cons of all sorts of devices. We finally narrowed it down and I decided I wanted another Samsung. I thought because I'm already familiar with Tabley AND because it supports the new and improved Sketchbook Pro app that I love. Old Tabley doesn't support the new and improved Sketchbook app....and the new and improved app has features I'm looking for, specifically a time lapse recorder. 

I've been setting it up and getting the feel of the controls, so to speak.

So, as I titled this post....submitted for your approval here is my first time lapse video.....

TAA DAA! 

A 'one-liner'.

                                      

I have to say....even though I'm not 'on camera' I was a little camera shy doing this....lol 

Go figure. 

HAPPY NEW YEAR